2024年3月3日发(作者：)
英语幽默短剧剧本
篇一：两个英语幽默短剧剧本The Pocket Money
英语幽默短剧剧本The Pocket Money
Scene1（At Salesman’s home）
N: In a dark dirty house, there lived a small, dirty salesman. He
always makes unhealthy candies and sells them to the students. He has a
lot of money now. But how does he make the candies? Oh, xu …… He
is coming!
S: Hello, do you know me? No? Oh, let me tell you .I’m the famous
candy salesman at the school gate. My candies are very popular,(展示)，I
don’t know why. The foolish students always come here. I’ll be a boss
soon! Candy, money, candy, money……
Oops! It’s time to make candies now.(看表)
First, put the flour on the table.
Then, water, sugar, flour.(边说边做)
Now press, press……
Oh, my dirty hands! Never mind! Just do it!(满不在意的神情)
Press, press……
Oh, my god!Never mind! Just do it!
Press, press, the children will not know it , it’s OK,hehehe……
Now let me cut it into pieces!
页 第 1
另一个
白雪公主与七个小矮人 Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs 英文短剧本
旁白：Once upon a time, there was a queen. She had a pretty
daughter named Snow White. Soon after the child was born, the queen
died. The queen married another queen. The stepmother was very
jealous. She dressed Snow White in rags and forced her to do the
housework all day and all night, such as sweep and mop the floor, do
some cleaning, carry water and so on.
白雪：( Sweep and mop the floor, do some cleaning, carry water
and so on.) 皇后：I’m the new queen. I’m very beautiful. you see. If
anyone is more beautiful than me, I’ll kill her. I have a magic mirror. If I
want to know something, It will tell me , mirror, mirror, come
here! 魔镜：Yes, I’m coming. Your Majesty! What do you want to know?
皇后：Mirror, mirror, on the is the fairest of the all?
魔镜：Yes. Your Majesty! You are the fairest of all, I there
is a young lady. She is as white as snow, as red as rose and as black as
is much more beautiful than you.
皇后：She is much more beautiful than me?Who is she? Tell me
quickly.
篇二：搞笑英语话剧剧本
搞笑英语话剧剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》
页 第 2
搞笑7人剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》
演员表：西门吹雪、叶孤城、花满楼、king、路人、上官雪儿
旁白
道具：牛奶两袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，纸屑若干。
第一幕：决战紫荆城之颠
旁白：A quiet village is covered with white snow .
Birds are dancing in the cold .
A man is walking along the street ,step by step .
Wind is coming in silence.
Another mysterious man approaches .
Y与X相遇．
X：oH ,I am sorry to knock you !
Y:, Never mind baby.
X:Excuse me， who are you on earth? Could you tell me your
name?
Y:,I won’t change my name! no matter what happens. I’m the
most famous——-YeGucheng. Who are you?
X:Iamximenchuixue.
Y惊讶:Ar, ximenchui xue?the best MartialArts?
X:Great, you know me !Today is your dead date!
Y抱腿：Please, please…… Don’t kill me! Let me go!
X:No, I must kill you !
页 第 3
Y:I don’t want to be killed. There are a eighty-year-old mother and
a three-year old son to be looked after by me!
X:No way! Because we are fighting now ! you know ?
Y突然站起冷冷的说：Don’t force me!
X:Pardon!
(Y拿出一袋牛奶)
X抢过牛奶:milk, very good ! I like drinking it. How do you know
that?
Y:please drink it!
X喝完牛奶:Thanks,
Y:Do you still want to kill me ?
X:Sure, must! Milk is milk.
Y(恼怒+冷酷):Very good ! very good ! I hope you will not forget
what you said!?
X:I’m sure I won’t!
Y:I must give you a lesson ! If I don’t beat you this time, you’ll
never behave properly ! 3-2-1!
X捂着肚子，蹲下（做痛苦状）：Oach,Oach !
Y大笑：HaHa……the milk is exceed the time limit
（一人路过，x起身跑过去）
X可怜状: excuse me! Help , help , Where is the
washroom?please ,tell me .
页 第 4
Y:Oh,I see ,go along this street and turn right when you see a
corssing road!
X:Thanks,byebye.
Y:byebye (以胜利者的语气，转头,看见 花满楼)
Y:Who are you?
H:Hua—man—-lou! Have you seen ximenchuixue?
Y:Yes, he was beaten by me and is in “WC” .
H惊讶:Now you are the best in the world !
Y:You are right !
H:Teriffic ! you are the one my king looking for ! do you want
join in us? If you follow my
king,he will give what you want.
Y:Yes,It’s very good.
H:Ok, follow me, Let’s go to see my king!
第二幕：无间道
H:My dearest ! let me introduce yegucheng to you! （指Y） this is
yegucheng.
K:sit down plese, yegucheng.
Y:excuse me,I have a you give me what I want just if I
follow you?
King:yes,I will.
Y:That’s good. Can you give me a MM ?
页 第 5
K:of are the one who has the similar taste with me!
Hahaha……
Y:of course.
美女出场
M:hello，帅锅..
K: this is ,now let’s have a ritual.
H走到Y前，《婚礼进行曲》起，H神甫状:Yegucheng! Do you want
to follow my king no matter
what happens such as cold headache , poor ,rich?
Y: Yes,I do.
K: Huamanlou, come . put the ring on his finger!（音乐停）
X唱着上:(看到戒指) this ring should be mine!
K:But who are you ? why should it belong to you?
Y急切: king! Dear king ! I must go now , my brother is looking for
me.
X冷酷:yegucheng! Come here ! I want to tell you something!
Y抱X的腿:old brother ! Forgive me!
X:Forgive you? Why ?
Y: Once there was a chance before me , I lost it . If the god give me
another chance, I’ll tell
you “ I love you ” , If the remustbea limited period,I hope it is
thousand year!
页 第 6
X:You shall cheat me ! all you did are wrong ! how can you tell me
the lady’s “WC”! Y:I like going lady’s WC .I……I……I think that you
like what I like.(Ｙ又拿出一袋牛奶)
X:milk?I love you.
K:Don’t say that “you love me”. I’ll kill you for you saying dirty
word to me !
X:What? (侧耳装着听不到) You—kill—-me?come, come…(Ｘ上去抓住K)
K:Fuck you. I must kill you!
X:How can you kill me? haha……
Y:Let me have a try! 3-2-1(X捂着肚子，蹲下)
M: oh,what happened?（看着X，做惊吓状）are you ok?（跑
到西门吹雪身边）
Y :do you want to go to wc?
X:Yes,I……I…… do.
Y:haha, the milk was added 三聚氰胺 beyond standards.
M: you , stupid , bad behavior ! go away !
K; why ? why do you help him ! who actually are you ?
M: actually,I’m a spy sended by LuXiaofeng,and I fell in love with
ximenchuixue. K惊讶: !you—you—You are X’lover?
Y: do you know, you are the first person who cheated me ! I
hate you .(轻声说)let me tell you,Ｘwill die.
页 第 7
M扑倒在Ｘ的身边：Ｘ,do’t die ,you should be alive ,there are
much hope in the future and
tomorrow is a good beginning !
K:what a moving story ! I was impressed ! Y:life is a progress ,but it
is depressed that it can not resume !
M: life is a progress ,and it is delight that it needn’t resume !
(M忽然将一把匕首插进Y的心脏，Ｋ吓跑.音乐《再见，警察》起)
Y痛苦状:I never anticipate you treat me by this ,why?tell me
why?(Y死，音乐停)
（X咳，H扑到身边，电影《我的父亲母亲》原声音乐起）
M: X , oh , no ,you can’t die ,we will go home together .
X:go home ! ?
M:Tomorrow is another day ! even you have the last second to
live ,you should be alive ,not only for me , but for our love.
X: promise me,you’ll get on well,and you’ll never let go.
M I promise . I will never let go（X死） ,
M: be alive !yeah , be alive ! be alive without ahendance !
篇三：英语搞笑话剧剧本
二人用版本
Scene1（At Salesman’s home）
N: In a dark dirty house, there lived a small, dirty salesman. He
页 第 8
always makes unhealthy candies and sells them to the students. He has a
lot of money now. But how does he make the candies? Oh, xu …… He
is coming! S: Hello, do you know me? No? Oh, let me tell you .I’m the
famous candy salesman at the school gate. My candies are very
popular,(展示)，I don’t know why. The foolish students always come
here. I’ll be a boss soon! Candy, money, candy, money……
Oops! It’s time to make candies now.(看表)
First, put the flour on the table.
Then, water, sugar, flour.(边说边做)
Now press, press……
Oh, my dirty hands! Never mind! Just do it!(满不在意的神情)
Press, press……
Oh, my god!Never mind! Just do it!
Press, press, the children will not know it , it’s OK,hehehe……
Now let me cut it into pieces
加旁白1人属于4人用）
白雪公主与七个小矮人 Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs 英文短剧本
旁白：Once upon a time, there was a queen. She had a pretty
daughter named Snow White. Soon after the child was born, the queen
died. The queen married another queen. The stepmother was very
jealous. She dressed Snow White in rags and forced her to do the
页 第 9
housework all day and all night, such as sweep and mop the floor, do
some cleaning, carry water and so on. 白雪：( Sweep and mop the floor,
do some cleaning, carry water and so on.) 皇后：I’m the new queen. I’m very beautiful. you see. If anyone is more beautiful than me, I’ll kill
her. I have a magic mirror. If I want to know something, It will tell me
, mirror, mirror, come here! 魔镜：Yes, I’m coming. Your
Majesty! What do you want to know? 皇后：Mirror, mirror, on the
is the fairest of the all?
魔镜：Yes. Your Majesty! You are the fairest of all, I there
is a young lady. She is as white as snow, as red as rose and as black as
is much more beautiful than you.
皇后：She is much more beautiful than me?Who is she? Tell me
quickly.
四人用版本
Global warming
A． Class begins, good afternoon everyone.
B． C. D ：Good afternoon, teacher.
A. First, I will ask you a question: What is the serious problem
nowadays ?
B. I think it’s the problem of environment pollution.
A. It’s related to our correct answer. But it isn’t correct one.
B. Is it the problem of population increasing?
页 第 10
A. No.
C. Oh. I got it. It’s global warming.
A. Right! Global warming is one of the serious problems nowadays.
Because……
B. Teacher. I have a question. It was very cold indeed this winter. I
think it’s global cooling!
A. You got the wrong concept. Global warming doesn’t only mean
that the weather is getting hot, but also mean that the weather is out of
control. So it will be sometimes very cold.
B. Teacher. What causes “ global warming”?
C. I know. Now people drive too many cars and the exhaust gases
discharged by the cars and lorries pollute the air and also destroy the
nature. It causes global warming.
A. You are right. Do you know what will happen with the global
warming?
B. Yes. The ices in South Pole are going to be melted and at the
time, many islands will be gradually flooded with water. Human will have
no places to live.
C. Surely, we don’t want that will happen.
A. What sould we do to stop “Global warming”?
B. I think we can protect the environment from ourselves. We can
plant trees
页 第 11
C. When we are protecting the environment, we are saving
ourselves.
A. Ok. Students, we can’t only speak but not do later . Let us go
planting trees.
D. Oh, teacher! Tomorrow is March the twelfth, it’s tree-planting
day!
A. Yes! Now all of you know the importance of protecting the
environment.
B．C．D．Let us do our best to stop “Global warming” and make
our earth a lovely homeland!
A. That is good . I hope you all will be succeeded in protecting the
environment. Now the class is over bye-bye students!
B.C.D. good bye. Teacher.
（4人版本）
Narration: Carrie, Cici and Wing are co-worker of a company. This
day they are talking in the office.
Ca: Bingo! I finally finish this case. It is really tough! I have not slept
well for almost a week.
Wing: Me too .I always get so busy in this season. I have drunk
three cups of coffee in order to keep awake.
Ci: Our boss must be enjoying his holiday in Fiji very much. What
do you think he will feel when he comes back to see our case?
页 第 12
Ca:Of course he will feel surprised and give each of us a promotion.
Wing: Come on, he is a devil, how could he do this to us? Anyway, we
should award ourselves for these days hard work!
Ca: You are right. Let’s pig out on junk food!
Wing: I have stayed in China for a whole year and I miss my
hometown. I miss German food!
Ca: so do I .how much I love French food!
Ci: I have not eaten German or French food before. Do you have
any recommendation?
Ca: If you visit France or go to a French restaurant, snails, cheese,
and goose liver and red wine are the best choices.
Wing: You also can’t miss the famous German sausage, ham and
blue checse Ci: They all sound yummy. But do you know what Chinese
eat when they miss their families?
Wing&Ca: No
Ci: The answer is dumplings!
Ca:Well ,I heard that before though I haven’t tasted .
Wing: Can you make dumplings, CiCi? Would you make some for
us? I have been longing for dumplings for a long time.
Ci: Aha, it is as easy as a pie for me .what about coming to my
house tonight? We can make dumplings together. I will teach you how to
cook it.
页 第 13
Ca: Great! That is fantastic. Then it will be the first time to make
and eat dumplings
Wing: Very good idea! We could busy some basic ingredient at the
supper
market after work.
Ci: need flour, yeast, pork, cabbages, vinegar, sauce and
ginger. (The three colleagues had their shopping and now they are in
CiCi’s house) CiCiours some pour on the table and said:”Carrie, can you
fetch some water here?”
Ca: sure, here you are .what s next?
Ci:Ci:we have to mix the flour yeast and water together .be
careful ,don’t add too much water.
Ca: Okay, I’m kneeing the dough is becoming and
softer Wing: Yeah, I am cutting the pork into many small pieces, and
then I will add several spoons of oil in it .shall I blend them?
CiCi: Yes, make sure they blend well. A bit salt and a spoon of
vinegar are needed, too.
(an hour later)
Ca: Yes, the dumplings are prepared .lets start!
CiCi: Wait! I remember well that you all miss the food from your
, what are these?
Ca: Wow! Cheese! Where did you get it? And my favorite red wine.
页 第 14
Wing: God. Those are sausage and ham, I can’t believe it!
CiCi: Haha, it is a big surprise, isn’t it? Now ,we are got all three
countries’ food ready.
Ca: So it is a complete big meal.
Wing: An unforgettable banquet in my life. Let’s cheers!
Ca, Ci, Wing: Cheers!
第 15
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